Just the Way You Are

If your profile had a relationship status (with yourself), what would you put? For most of my life, it was “complicated”. While I was addicted to porn (1998-2008), for instance, part of me despised myself. Likewise, during the evolution of my first divorce, I just didn’t want to be me. Following my second divorce in 2013, … Continue reading Just the Way You Are

It’s All About Our “Spirit”

I feel blessed to still be riding the wave of 2 recent “mountaintop” experiences. While one was a rock-and-roll, soul-shining themed cruise, the other was the first in-person retreat for the doctoral program I’m in. Although the former featured lots of yogis, and the latter was for seminary students from all manner of Christian backgrounds, … Continue reading It’s All About Our “Spirit”

The Love Castle

I dig metaphors, and one that’s speaking to me lately is choosing to live in a Love Castle. It’s where our family’s life together is akin to a castle, one that only allows love in over its moat and through its gates. No love, no entry! To be clear, “love”, as I understand it, is the giving … Continue reading The Love Castle

Release to be Renewed

Nature has a lot to teach us. Autumn is a time of letting go, as fruits and veggies ripen to produce new offspring, while leaves gently fall to the ground. This letting go not only helps vegetation survive the winter, it plants the seeds for the eruption of new life in the Spring! The message … Continue reading Release to be Renewed

License to Love

You know how James Bond has a License to Kill? And, as the mask and vac debates reveal, it seems Americans have a License to Individual Freedom? What if, we all lived from a License to Love? Like, for reals! I know when people wrong my wife Lisa, by abusing her kindness (which happens A … Continue reading License to Love

Love First … and Ask Questions Later

I did a 9/11 Reflection ride on the Peloton the other day—and amidst the many tears—two lessons from that time, which speak to today’s hurt and polarization, came to me: BE WITH and BE IN. To be with is when, no matter one’s religion, race, politics, gender, sexuality, etc., we 100% have each other’s backs. To be in is … Continue reading Love First … and Ask Questions Later

Letting Go to Letting Love In

This year, a major theme in my life has been: Letting go to let Love in. Turns out, there were things I was clinging to or striving for, which were “unplugging” me from life-giving love—filling me with insecurity, worry, stress, and anxiety. Deciding, in varying ways, to “let go”, has not only been massively freeing, it’s filled me with … Continue reading Letting Go to Letting Love In

Seeing Our Blind-spots

The other day, my literal blind-spots got me thinking about the "blind-spots" we all have. While Lisa and I were out enjoying a nice, long walk on a beautiful summer day with our dog Biscuits, I heard somebody outside my field of view say something about a "nice doggy". Lacking any peripheral vision from a … Continue reading Seeing Our Blind-spots

The “Pose” Changes the Person

At perhaps the lowest point in my life, when I was feeling unloved, unlovable, and unloving, want to know the “odd” thing that made a BIG difference in flipping the script? Heart-openers! Poses in yoga that expand one’s heart-center, and hence one’s love. While that might seem woo-woo, the fabulous thing is studies are showing … Continue reading The “Pose” Changes the Person

Beholding Beauty

Sometimes when I look at a person (especially my wife Lisa), a sunset, or another bit of nature, among other things, I find myself captured and enraptured. Words escape me and time ceases, as in a real way, a "spell" has been put on me. Richard Rohr names these magical moments "beholding". It's when we … Continue reading Beholding Beauty